I don't think people have much patience for typing strangers based on pure 3rd party description but I'm feeling sentimental and wanna talk about her anyway. I posted pics somewhere at some point, when I was more careless and invested in the forum, but I can't remember if there was a consensus - maybe LSE, since that's what I've been typing her for awhile.
The LSE typing is mostly predicated in my mind on her being very into maintaining a good home and caring for children. She even majored in home ec in college with dreams of managing her family well. She has a bunch of kids and they are the main focus and purpose in her life. Also the fact that she's very partisan and into politics, she enjoys rubbing elbows with local politicians, even ran for county commissioner, and took pleasure in her daughter being a journalist, giving her more access to and knowledge of those circles.
The home ec/good mother stuff doesn't make her old fashioned or demure at all. To me she's kind of the model of a strong and independent woman that I didn't get in my own family. She's a single mom and does everything herself, she is very blunt and opinionated, and doesn't seem afraid of much. She makes major, life changing decisions with ease and confidence. She is one of those people who states ugly truths with a laugh and a shrug. She doesn't give a ladylike impression, but I think she might be slightly pained by this and wish to be more so. She dresses for comfort, scoffs at high heels, and when she takes risks with makeup and stuff it's kinda iffy.
The single area where she struggles, makes choices that aren't in her best interest, and has insecurities is when it comes to men. She has a string of exes that she's not on good terms with. She seems to be the save-a-man type. Seeing her date is endearing because it's the only time her bravado falls and she's like, "what do I do? I don't know if he likes me?" She's always afraid of coming on too strong and never wants to make the first move (which seems in contrast to her personality), but maybe that's just how she was raised (in the 70s/80s). She frequently asks her IEE daughter for advice.
Imo she has a good relationship with her daughter, even though her daughter always complains about her to me - mainly pushiness and attempts to control her, lack of patience, and the effect of her romantic decisions on her life. Her daughter has been my friend since I was 12, and her mother refers to me as "my other daughter" and has always been very inclusive towards me. Actually what inspired this sentimentality is that she invited me to Easter - she knows I've been really lonely lately and has been conscious to make efforts to bring me in and I really appreciate it.
The thing about her that I find most helpful or 'dualizing' is the way when I'm under stress she quickly and decisively tells me "this is what is in your control. This is what is out of your control." It eases my anxiety immensely, because that information is not very clear to me myself. She doesn't go into clear instruction/detail or the micro management that annoys me in other LSEs, but if I ask she'll give me the best starting point. I don't experience her as pushy or controlling like her daughter does, maybe because I'm not actually her daughter. But based on the occasional comment she makes, to be honest I think she sees me as more competent. She doesn't tell me what to do. It's more that she provides a feeling of clarity and makes the landscape look more simple for me to navigate through the way I want to.
She lacks patience for people who ask for help without being willing to help themselves, don't take responsibly for their lives, and make excuses. This seems to be her biggest pet peeve. But she's generous by nature and pretty reasonable in her judgment of others.
So yeah.. I've pondered her being my dual, but overall LSE seems most appropriate. Input is cool, but mostly I just felt like talking about her.
The LSE typing is mostly predicated in my mind on her being very into maintaining a good home and caring for children. She even majored in home ec in college with dreams of managing her family well. She has a bunch of kids and they are the main focus and purpose in her life. Also the fact that she's very partisan and into politics, she enjoys rubbing elbows with local politicians, even ran for county commissioner, and took pleasure in her daughter being a journalist, giving her more access to and knowledge of those circles.
The home ec/good mother stuff doesn't make her old fashioned or demure at all. To me she's kind of the model of a strong and independent woman that I didn't get in my own family. She's a single mom and does everything herself, she is very blunt and opinionated, and doesn't seem afraid of much. She makes major, life changing decisions with ease and confidence. She is one of those people who states ugly truths with a laugh and a shrug. She doesn't give a ladylike impression, but I think she might be slightly pained by this and wish to be more so. She dresses for comfort, scoffs at high heels, and when she takes risks with makeup and stuff it's kinda iffy.
The single area where she struggles, makes choices that aren't in her best interest, and has insecurities is when it comes to men. She has a string of exes that she's not on good terms with. She seems to be the save-a-man type. Seeing her date is endearing because it's the only time her bravado falls and she's like, "what do I do? I don't know if he likes me?" She's always afraid of coming on too strong and never wants to make the first move (which seems in contrast to her personality), but maybe that's just how she was raised (in the 70s/80s). She frequently asks her IEE daughter for advice.
Imo she has a good relationship with her daughter, even though her daughter always complains about her to me - mainly pushiness and attempts to control her, lack of patience, and the effect of her romantic decisions on her life. Her daughter has been my friend since I was 12, and her mother refers to me as "my other daughter" and has always been very inclusive towards me. Actually what inspired this sentimentality is that she invited me to Easter - she knows I've been really lonely lately and has been conscious to make efforts to bring me in and I really appreciate it.
The thing about her that I find most helpful or 'dualizing' is the way when I'm under stress she quickly and decisively tells me "this is what is in your control. This is what is out of your control." It eases my anxiety immensely, because that information is not very clear to me myself. She doesn't go into clear instruction/detail or the micro management that annoys me in other LSEs, but if I ask she'll give me the best starting point. I don't experience her as pushy or controlling like her daughter does, maybe because I'm not actually her daughter. But based on the occasional comment she makes, to be honest I think she sees me as more competent. She doesn't tell me what to do. It's more that she provides a feeling of clarity and makes the landscape look more simple for me to navigate through the way I want to.
She lacks patience for people who ask for help without being willing to help themselves, don't take responsibly for their lives, and make excuses. This seems to be her biggest pet peeve. But she's generous by nature and pretty reasonable in her judgment of others.
So yeah.. I've pondered her being my dual, but overall LSE seems most appropriate. Input is cool, but mostly I just felt like talking about her.