An unsorted collection of thoughts about Fe Role / being 1d Fi and having slightly stronger but unvalued Fe.
So this is actually about my experiences and not just delta NFs, although I think they are somewhat more prone to being pressured into being emotionally vibrant and expressive. At least I know several who are that way. I suppose the only people who I don't feel this from regularly are natural gammas", but I also feel like they expect me to be more openly bitter at times than I necessarily am. They seem to thrive more off of actual negativity and vengeance or belief that someone should be smited or hated, where as that even seems like an emotional content that is also draining over time.
For me, there's a long-standing feeling of simply being a-emotional, as in, sans emotional content. Not "I don't feel anything, I'm sad and distant / emo", but rather, I just don't engage in it, particularly as forms of communication. I feel this with 1d Fe people of delta and gamma in particular, that they subconsciously or overtly need me to present Fe to them, and it's tiresome over time. I'm actually better able to speak on emotional terms to convey something, especially about life or meaning or deeper things. But to be that way for everyday communication all the time, or if someone "needs that" from me in order for themselves to feel "safe" or "understood" consistently, it falls out. Thus, 'they only like you when you're smiling'.
For me in a Fe role sense, I hate the drain, it almost feels constantly there. The exception is most delta NFs, and maybe some alpha SFs who "just accept that's how I am and are used to it", and yes sure ESI etc.
I am reminded of the Weisband description, which has always been particularly true for me:
http://www.socioniko.net/en/1.1.types/ps.html
3. "Rage is a mighty god of the strong". He tends to take other people out of the condition of complacency. He does not speak much about what is good, considers it self-evident. With his grumbling emotions he strives to extinguish emotions of others. He believes that redundant emotions tire people, and this is absolutely true if applied to his dual (The Humanist). During a conversation he pressures his interlocutor, even tries to intimidate him, but if people do not fear him, he becomes courteous and polite. Fury is his line of defense in a situation of emergency in which he feels otherwise helpless. The aim of his fury is to mobilize his partner, and when this is achieved, he calms down.
Which is why it is agitating when people expect so much effort from me to emotionally coax them. I've learned how to be more emotionally diplomatic over time and I can be good at it, but it is quickly draining for me. I have since developed a new understanding for all the gymnastics that the NFs can do , and try to keep them in check about over exerting on that front, too.
When I can be sour-toned and bitter, and while not having to go full gamma and rage pit, but just let be for whatever it is - that's comforting and the people I've felt that most consistently from are EIIs and IEEs, (actually ESI also, I suppose).
I think for most people who are unfamiliar with either socionics or are lovingly close to a Te dominant person and understand its ways, they have a hard time understanding that Fe role can make people seem a certain way at will or when needed to be, but also there are times when it can be entirely dropped or not want to be dealt with at all, even treated like a ragdoll or something insignificant.
Lastly, I'll recall some description that spoke about how for Fi dominants they help their duals deal with their Fe role by differentiating in salient ways when something is important enough to tend to emotionally or when to not even bother with the Fe realm. I think in that way Fi dominants or at least other people who are understanding enough of that process are a bit of a salve for what can be a jagged and overheated, extremely rational/pragmatic /utilitarian default outlook.
I have found that Fi dominants are perhaps more uniquely attuned to persevering through that, as I think Fe demonstratives / Fi creatives are somewhat more offset by the outbursts and jaggedness, feeling more comfortable occupying an emotionally vacated space of their dual's Fe POLR. I always feel like Fe POLRs are kind of passive-aggressively if not aggressively asking for this big wave of Fe, just in the way they want it, subdued according to other things / valued elements. But for me, I don't want that, ever. It tends to even make me more violent in my pushing away of that kind of stimulus, even if they mean well at times.
I'm not sure how it is for LIE, but I know for me, when I am emotionally angry, it is like the profile above, and I want it to lead to an ending of vast emotional content, not more of it. I want it to be a move towards silence, and not a plea or request to be washed over with emotional vibrancy. It's a bit like a grounding rod, perhaps - a way to channel the emotional energy that it results in a conclusion.
So this is actually about my experiences and not just delta NFs, although I think they are somewhat more prone to being pressured into being emotionally vibrant and expressive. At least I know several who are that way. I suppose the only people who I don't feel this from regularly are natural gammas", but I also feel like they expect me to be more openly bitter at times than I necessarily am. They seem to thrive more off of actual negativity and vengeance or belief that someone should be smited or hated, where as that even seems like an emotional content that is also draining over time.
For me, there's a long-standing feeling of simply being a-emotional, as in, sans emotional content. Not "I don't feel anything, I'm sad and distant / emo", but rather, I just don't engage in it, particularly as forms of communication. I feel this with 1d Fe people of delta and gamma in particular, that they subconsciously or overtly need me to present Fe to them, and it's tiresome over time. I'm actually better able to speak on emotional terms to convey something, especially about life or meaning or deeper things. But to be that way for everyday communication all the time, or if someone "needs that" from me in order for themselves to feel "safe" or "understood" consistently, it falls out. Thus, 'they only like you when you're smiling'.
For me in a Fe role sense, I hate the drain, it almost feels constantly there. The exception is most delta NFs, and maybe some alpha SFs who "just accept that's how I am and are used to it", and yes sure ESI etc.
I am reminded of the Weisband description, which has always been particularly true for me:
Quote:
http://www.socioniko.net/en/1.1.types/ps.html
3. "Rage is a mighty god of the strong". He tends to take other people out of the condition of complacency. He does not speak much about what is good, considers it self-evident. With his grumbling emotions he strives to extinguish emotions of others. He believes that redundant emotions tire people, and this is absolutely true if applied to his dual (The Humanist). During a conversation he pressures his interlocutor, even tries to intimidate him, but if people do not fear him, he becomes courteous and polite. Fury is his line of defense in a situation of emergency in which he feels otherwise helpless. The aim of his fury is to mobilize his partner, and when this is achieved, he calms down.
Which is why it is agitating when people expect so much effort from me to emotionally coax them. I've learned how to be more emotionally diplomatic over time and I can be good at it, but it is quickly draining for me. I have since developed a new understanding for all the gymnastics that the NFs can do , and try to keep them in check about over exerting on that front, too.
When I can be sour-toned and bitter, and while not having to go full gamma and rage pit, but just let be for whatever it is - that's comforting and the people I've felt that most consistently from are EIIs and IEEs, (actually ESI also, I suppose).
I think for most people who are unfamiliar with either socionics or are lovingly close to a Te dominant person and understand its ways, they have a hard time understanding that Fe role can make people seem a certain way at will or when needed to be, but also there are times when it can be entirely dropped or not want to be dealt with at all, even treated like a ragdoll or something insignificant.
Lastly, I'll recall some description that spoke about how for Fi dominants they help their duals deal with their Fe role by differentiating in salient ways when something is important enough to tend to emotionally or when to not even bother with the Fe realm. I think in that way Fi dominants or at least other people who are understanding enough of that process are a bit of a salve for what can be a jagged and overheated, extremely rational/pragmatic /utilitarian default outlook.
I have found that Fi dominants are perhaps more uniquely attuned to persevering through that, as I think Fe demonstratives / Fi creatives are somewhat more offset by the outbursts and jaggedness, feeling more comfortable occupying an emotionally vacated space of their dual's Fe POLR. I always feel like Fe POLRs are kind of passive-aggressively if not aggressively asking for this big wave of Fe, just in the way they want it, subdued according to other things / valued elements. But for me, I don't want that, ever. It tends to even make me more violent in my pushing away of that kind of stimulus, even if they mean well at times.
I'm not sure how it is for LIE, but I know for me, when I am emotionally angry, it is like the profile above, and I want it to lead to an ending of vast emotional content, not more of it. I want it to be a move towards silence, and not a plea or request to be washed over with emotional vibrancy. It's a bit like a grounding rod, perhaps - a way to channel the emotional energy that it results in a conclusion.